Lifeway

I hadn’t thought of this in a while, but with the recent news that Lifeway Christian Resources is closing its physical stores, I had a memory I wanted to share.  In 1999, I had just moved back to Nashville after spending a few years in Kentucky, and I was looking for a decent job.  A family member worked for LCR, and she forwarded me one of their applications.  I never finished filling it out.  After reading their policies, it just felt creepy.  I still considered myself Christian at the time, and hadn’t yet realized I was trans, but their policies still felt discriminatory and only borderline legal.

I had to go through some old CDs to find this, but I'd saved this bit of text from the application.  Note that the very top of the application claimed "We are an equal employment opportunity employer."  The definition of "equal opportunity employer" (according to Merriam Webster) is "an employer who agrees not to discriminate against any employee or job applicant because of race, color, religion, national origin, sex, physical or mental disability, or age."

The first few pages of the application asked the normal questions you would expect to see on an application.  Then there was a section titled "Personal Information", which asked your religious denomination, and where you attend church.  Finally, there was a section titled "Lifestyle Considerations" that had the following paragraphs:

Because of the unique and special nature of LifeWay Christian Resources, employees are expected to manifest conduct and actions which project an image consistent with the expressed purpose and mission of Lifeway. Southern Baptist churches have voluntarily given LifeWay a place of influence based upon the values of trust and respect.  It is, therefore; imperative employees favorably represent LifeWay.

Conduct which brings embarrassment to LifeWay or impedes its credibility with constituents is unacceptable.  Conduct or other actions inconsistent with that normally expected of Southern Baptist denominational employees is unacceptable.  Similarly, conduct or other actions perceived as inconsistent are unacceptable.  Examples of such conduct are involvement with alcohol, illegal drugs, pre-marital or extra-marital sex, cohabitation apart from the marriage relationship, homosexuality, and outside interests and pursuits which would normally be considered incompatible with LifeWay's mission.

LifeWay Christian Resources has not only the right, but also the responsibility to do everything possible to ensure the stated purpose and mission of LifeWay continues in its highest tradition and is not harmed or impeded by unacceptable behavior on the part of its employees.

Consistent with this purpose, LifeWay's policy is to ensure all applicant and employee behavior meets LifeWay's standards of acceptable conduct.  As a part of this policy, and individual's current and past conduct is reviewed.  Therefore, please respond accordingly to the inquiry below.  A yes answer does not automatically disqualify you from further consideration for employment, as each individual's circumstances are reviewed.

Do you have, or have you had, any lifestyle, conduct, or activity which would project an image which could embarrass LifeWay or impede its credibility with its constituents as referred to above?  (yes) (no) If yes,please explain:

I don’t know if these are still their policies today.  If they are, I wonder if they’re still so open about it.

Jack of all Trades, Master of None

I think my biggest problem is a lack of focus.  It’s been this way all my life.  I never knew what I wanted to be when I grew up.  (I still don’t.)  My brother had a laser-guided focus – he wanted to be an artist from a very early age, and never strayed anywhere else.  Sure, he had other hobbies, but none of them were potential careers.  Meanwhile, I kept going back and forth between wanting to draw comic books, write novels, and program video games.  I think I had a natural talent for some of those things, but I just couldn’t concentrate on any one hobby long enough to become competent.

I created several video games for the Commodore 64.  Nothing particularly complicated, mostly Defender-style shooters.  I didn’t actually know a programming language, I used a program called “Garry Kitchen’s Gamemaker”.  Additionally, I bought every game I could find that allowed you to design your own levels.  Excitebike.  Wrecking Crew.  Lode Runner.  More recently, Super Mario Maker.  I loved level design.  But I never got so into it that I learned how to make games from scratch.  Learning a computer language would have taken a level of dedication I didn’t possess.  I still sometimes think about learning to program, but I just can’t make myself start.  I’m afraid of investing money into classes I might not finish.

I drew comic books.  On notebook paper, just for my friends to read.  I started around third grade, and kept going until I was in my mid-20s.  My art did improve during that time – how could it not improve at least a little – but I never took the time to get really good at drawing.  I still sometimes get the urge to start a webcomic, but something shiny always distracts me before I go too far in that direction.

I wrote short stories.  This was mostly later, after high school.  Whenever I created a character for D&D, I would write a short story about them.  I wrote a full novel about some space bounty hunters, and several short stories with the same characters.  I still go back to them now and then, trying to fix some flaws and remove the worst clichés.  I don’t care about whether my stories make any money, it would be nice just to have something out there, perhaps on the Kindle store.  But I’m afraid I don’t have the attention span to complete them.

I’ve always been attracted to hybrid hobbies, ones that combine two or more skills without demanding you be an expert in any of them.  Drawing comic books took both writing and drawing skills – but less writing than a novelist and less artistic skill than a painter.  For a few years I made virtual paper dolls for a program called KISS (“Kisekae Set System”), which required small amounts of art and programming.  I even wrote short stories to go along with some of my KISS dolls.  I spent over a year designing a persistent world module for NeverWinter Nights – which took small amounts of computer scripting, writing dialogue, and general creative worldbuilding.

I have random weird skills without the secondary skills required to make the primary skills monetizable.  For example, I’m very good at proofreading (as long as I didn’t write it).  When I read books, spelling errors just jump out at me as if they were written in bold type.  Unfortunately, I don’t read fast enough to proofread for a living, and the invention of the spellchecker probably cut down on the number of professional proofreaders out there anyway.

Successful people have passion, usually for something very specific.  I don’t have specific passions.  I don’t latch onto specific hobbies.  I get caught up in odd minor aspects of hobbies that never result in me finishing a project.  I’m certain I fit in somewhere in the world.  I’m certain there’s a job or hobby out there that would fit me like a glove.  Everyone wants to be a rock star or a famous actor, but nobody dreams about being a key grip or lighting director.  I’m pretty sure I’m designed to have one of those technical jobs that nobody ever talks about, but the fact that nobody ever talks about it is the reason I haven’t heard of it.  Something in the entertainment industry, that requires minor knowledge of two or three fields without needing expertise in any of them.  Nothing that would put me on camera, nothing that would make me a household name, and I’m fine with that.

I know there’s a job out there that I could be passionate about, I just don’t know how to find it.